


Better Part of Me

by Takianna



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Death, F/M, Friendship, Love, Memories
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-29
Updated: 2018-03-29
Packaged: 2019-04-14 15:22:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14138865
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Takianna/pseuds/Takianna
Summary: Olicity AU with the whole gang of friends.  Preparing for a major event in life is nothing like she thought it would be and thankfully everyone is there to help her.Everything in italic is a memory throughout the entire story.COMPLETE





	1. Chapter 1

Her well manicured hand drifted over the row of ties neatly folded in the drawer of the closet. There was the red one Oliver often wore for important press conferences as he did his duties as Mayor; the dark green silk one Felicity bought him for their first anniversary as a special nod to his other identity; and row upon row of others too numerous to remember all the times she had seen him wear them.

 Her fingers stopped and settled on a blue one, with flecks of color that matched his eyes. The tie made her mind slip back to the first time she saw him wearing it and the corners of her lips turned up at the memory of that night not so long ago.

_“It’s pouring,” Oliver said looking out the window of the small restaurant where they were sharing an intimate meal. They hadn’t been on a date in almost two weeks with work and Felicity trying to start her own company. Their schedules never seemed to sync, but Oliver pulled a few strings to get them into the restaurant after hours when they both could be there._

_“We should have driven,” Felicity said and sipped her wine leisurely, her eyes joining his as they both looked out the window. The sky had just let loose and as night fell, the city was overtaken by the constant rain pouring from the sky._

_“What’s the fun in that?” he laughed. Felicity found it infectious and chuckled in unison. He’s smile broadened as he looked at her and Felicity felt a blush rise to her cheeks at being under his scrutiny. Sometimes she felt as though she should pinch herself because she was sitting there with Oliver Queen, a man who was so far out of her league, or so she always thought._

_“C’mon,” he said taking her hand and pulling her to her feet. She chugged the rest of her wine before intertwining her fingers with his. She saw a smile tug at his lips as though he was a child with a plan he couldn’t tell anyone else. Something told Felicity she would need hours worth of cuddles to warm up from his plan._

_“But what about the rain?” Felicity asked as they stood in front of the door looking out at the empty street._

_Oliver shrugged off his suit jacket and held it up over their heads. Felicity leaned against him for balance as she pulled off her heels. She clutched them in her hand and prepared herself for the downpour. This was a first._

_“Ready?” Oliver asked. Felicity nodded and bit her bottom lip. She blushed again because it was an unconscious act, but she knew Oliver loved it. He leaned down to press a kiss to her lips to reassure her that he hadn’t missed the small nervous gesture. Felicity let a smile spread across her face and decided anywhere with Oliver was the place she wanted to be, even in the rain._

_They slipped out into the downpour, the pavement shining against the street lamps that lit their way. Felicity giggled as they tramped through puddles that gathered in small depressions of the sidewalk, the water splashing up against her legs. Once she almost slipped, clutching Oliver’s arm to steady herself, and he laughed as he slowed so that she could get her feet under her._

_Stopping under the spotlight of a street lamp, Felicity faced him, her hand gripping the knot of his tie and pulled his lips to meet hers. The kiss began softly, but quickly Felicity felt his tongue swipe against her lips and she parted them to let him explore her mouth. Her fingers gripped his tie tighter as her other hand found the hair at the back of his neck, a place Oliver loved her to touch._

_Oliver grunted in protest at being unable to wrap his arms around her and  he dropped his jacket. He tangled one hand in her hair, the other pressed against her back to draw her closer to him as though their bodies could become one._

_The rain poured over them, but Felicity took little notice. The heat of the kiss warmed her whole body. God how she loved this man. God how she loved the sweetness of his kiss and the hot body didn’t hurt either. She felt desire pooling in her stomach as he continued to kiss her._

_Oliver pulled away from her, his breathing shallow and rapid. HIs eyes took her in as though they were reading every thought she had ever had in her life. Over time his gaze became easier to handle, but Felicity felt uncomfortable as the raine made her dress cling to her body. She raised her arms to hold them over herself in a self conscious gesture and knew it wasn’t the right thing to do. He loved her, no matter what, right?_

_Oliver’s eyes turned dark, his face an expressionless mask. Felicity sensed his dislike and lowered her eyes to the ground in defeat. Quickly his fingers cupped her chin and forced her to look up at him. HIs eyes, still dark, were tender as he searched her face. She was sure her makeup had fun off by now and she looked like a clown. Men were so lucky sometimes._

_Oliver leaned close to her, his breath on her cheek._

_“Don’t ever feel like you are ugly,” he said quietly, his hands resting on her waist. “You are beautiful and I’m not going to run away like your father.”_

_His hand moved to lay on her heart. It was far from a sexual touch, but reassurance coursed through her body just as he hand lay against her chest._

_“Wherever you go, I go,” he said in a faint whisper. “My heart will always be right here with yours.”_

_The tears rolled down her cheeks mixing with the rain. She had always been in love with Oliver. He was so willing to reassure her a thousand times if that is what it took to prove his love. Someone with abandonment issues was not easy to love, but Oliver knew a thing or two about being broken. His patience was admirable._

_“Thank you,” she said her voice barely squeaking past the lump in her throat that threatened to strangle her._

_“I should be thanking you,” he said and smiled. “I never thought I would be this man that your love made me.”_

_The kiss was almost a whisper on her lips, but it shot through her body like a fire that would never cease to exist, ever._


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was one of my favorite chapters in this story to write. I wanted Oliver to interact with Bruce Wayne, but I didn't want it to be actual interaction until the very end. I think it's fun to play with the comms and how they are listening to each other.
> 
> Hope you enjoy!
> 
> Everything in italics is a memory, throughout the entire piece.

The knock at the door was soft and then it cracked open, John Diggle poking his head inside. Felicity smiled weakly at the man. The returned smile felt forced, but Felicity busied herself with the tie in her hand.

“Brought you some coffee,” he said as he entered the room fully. He held out a cup in the his large hand, offering it to her.

“Thanks,” was all she could manage in return as she took the cup. Holding it in both hands as she willed it to warm her, although it was failing miserably.

“Like old times,” Dig said thoughtfully.

“Yep,” she said inhaling the aroma from the cup in her hands.

 

_ “They are moving,” Felicity said quietly into her comm. She hoped nobody thought she was talking to herself. She didn’t need help when it came to proving she was strange. She had that all covered. _

_ “I’ve got them,” Dig chimed in. _

_ “Oliver?” she asked and then sipped from her champagne flute, eyes darting around to find him in the crowd. Felicity shifted on her feet to try and see if he was behind her while trying not to draw too much attention to her moves. _

_ “A little busy,” he finally answered as he grunted. Felicity heard several grunts and thuds then an eerie silence that rang through her body, settling in her bones. _

_ Lifting the flute to her lips, Felicity chugged the entire contents, trying to settle her nerves. As she placed the glass down on the small table, another one was offered to her. Ray Palmer stood smiling at her. The shiver that started at her toes, ran up her spine before she could stop it. _

_ “Felicity,” he said gently as he handed her the glass and his fingers brushed against her. She hated the way his touch lingered too long on her skin and he was always trying to find a need to be near her. _

_ “Ray,” she acknowledged knowing Oliver could hear her. The growl that rang in her ear erased any doubt of that fact. Felicity kept a small smirk from flitting across her lips. Oliver was always so protective, especially when it came to Ray Palmer. That was one person Oliver really couldn’t stand for her to be around. _

_ “Enjoying the evening?” the conversation continued. _

_ “Yes,” Felicity said easily. “And you?” _

_ “It’s been interesting,” he said. “Have you met Bruce Wayne yet?” _

_ Felicity shook her head no and drank down the champagne Ray offered. The bubbles tickled her nose and she scrunched it up. Ray’s hand came to her face and brushed her cheek lightly. She tried to fight the need to pull away from him because it was all about keeping up appearances when it came to these kinds of events. _

_ “I swear I will cut that hand off,” Oliver growled in her ear. In the background she heard Dig’s trademark snicker. Whether it was the three glasses of champagne of the way Oliver was talking, she wasn’t sure, but Felicity felt her body flush from head to toe. _

_ “C’mon, let me introduce you,” Ray said taking her hand and pulling her across the large room to a knot of people on the other side of the dance floor. _

_ “Mr. Wayne,” Ray said getting the attention of the man who was at the center of the group. “This is Felicity Smoak.” _

_ Wayne’s eyes lit up as he approached her, taking her hand and raising it to his lips as he brushed them against her knuckles. Felicity let out a small giggle, definitely the champagne. _

_ “Ms. Smoak,” Bruce said cooly. “I have heard great things about you.” _

_ Felicity smiled as he released her hand. There was something about the man’s eyes that held her gaze and then there was another growl from Oliver right in her ear. _

_ “Mr. Wayne,” she said a little too breathlessly. “How are things in Gotham?” _

_ “Bruce, please,” he said with a disarming smile. “Gotham is busy, but it seems to be missing some of the beauty found here in Star City.” _

_ Another low growl tickled her ear. _

_ “Tell me Ms. Smoak,” Bruce continued, “why are you wasting away at Queen Consolidated?” _

_ Felicity choked and started coughing, her face red. _

_ “Excuse me?” she asked when the coughing fit ended. _

_ “Someone with your skill should not be lingering as an IT girl,” he said gently. “You should come to Wayne Enterprises. I’m sure a job as head of Research and Development fits your abilities much better.” _

_ “Over my dead body,” Oliver growled in her ear. Felicity couldn’t help but smile at the jealousy Oliver was showing. It couldn’t hurt to egg him on just a little. _

_ “Sounds interesting,” she said sweetly. That earned her a guttural growl from Oliver. There he was in all his jealous glory. Sometimes a girl had to fish for that kind of protectiveness and usually Oliver didn’t disappoint. _

_ “Let’s have a drink and we can talk more,” Bruce said offering her his arm. She gladly slipped hers through the offered arm and they walked to the bar. _

_ “Champagne?” he asked looking at her with a smile. _

_ “Yes, please,” Felicity agreed. Taking the flute offered her. Felicity drank greedily, afraid she would lose any nerve she had. Bruce watched her and Felicity felt her body flush under his gaze. What was she thinking? _

_ “So you never answered why you stay here?” he said casually. Felicity finished her champagne and smiled at the other man. _

_ “They gave me a chance,” she said shrugging. _

_ “So a man?” Bruce said with a knowing smile. _

_ “Damn right,” she heard in her ear. _

_ “And how would you ever come to that conclusion?” Felicity asked and giggled. _

_ Bruce leaned close to her ear, breath brushing against her ear as he spoke, sending a shiver up her spine. _

_ “He’s talking to you right now, isn’t he?” _

_ Felicity’s cheeks flushed. Damn all the champagne. She would pay for it tomorrow. _

_ “I have no idea what you are talking about,” she said signaling the bartender for another drink. Graciously she took it and sipped from the glass hoping to calm the nerves that threatened to choke her. _

_ “We can stop playing games now,” Bruce said fixing her with a cold look. Felicity felt herself shiver at the tone of his voice. There was something so dark behind his eyes that made her question even being alone with him. _

_ Suddenly a warm hand slide into the small of her back and she knew she had nothing to fear. Oliver stood next to her fixing Bruce with a deathly look. His jaw was set tight and she saw the muscles in his neck flex as he tried to control his temper. _

_ “Mr. Wayne,” he said tightly to the other man. _

_ “Mr. Queen,” Bruce said, the tension thick between them. _

_ “Felicity I think we should get you some coffee,” Oliver said turning his eyes to her. Her head started spinning and she didn’t realize how tipsy she really was until that moment. Maybe she shouldn’t have had so many glasses of champagne. _

_ “This isn’t over Queen,” Bruce said as Oliver guided her away from the bar. _

_ “It is because I’m ending it,” Oliver said in a hushed threat. _

_ “We can’t run from who we are,” Bruce said in a veiled nod to the fact that he might know who Oliver Queen really was during the night. _

_ “Dig the car,” Oliver said and picked Felicity up as she stumbled . She snuggled against him, safe in his arms. _

_ “We need to stop for coffee too,” Felicity heard Oliver say as her eyes drifted closed and she swore she heard Dig chuckling in her ear. _

  
  
  
  



	3. Chapter 3

Felicity’s hands held the warm mug tightly, the large thick band on her finger clinking against the porcelain of the mug, breaking the short silence between them.

“Tommy should be here soon,” Dig said. “Just let me know when you are ready.”

“Thanks Dig,” she said, her eyes never leaving her ring. The memory of the day she saw it for the first time made a smile come to her lips.

 

  
_ “ _ _ Close your eyes,” Oliver said with a chuckle. _

_ “Really Oliver…” she started, but then his face hardened and Felicity could tell he was feeling disappointment. Sometimes she just needed to play along with him. _

_ “OK,” she said and closed her eyes. A smile drifted across her lips at the last time she closed her eyes. That time Oliver hd stripped down to his boxer briefs to ‘surprise’ her. _

_ It was a surprise, that was for sure, and the laughter that followed was only met with frowns from Oliver. Felicity learned that night not to let her first reaction get the best of her in these sort of situations. Oliver might not look fragile, but sometimes he still was that vulnerable person who needed an extra boost of confidence. _

_ Felicity felt Oliver slip a small box into her hand. She knew it wasn’t an engagement ring because that was already on her finger. The curiosity began to gnaw at her insides. _

_ “What is it?” she asked breathlessly, the excitement growing in her stomach. _

_ “Open your eyes,” Oliver whispered. _

_ Felicity slowly opened her eyes and there was a ring box settled in her palm. _

_ “I don’t understand,” she started, but his fingers came up to stop her from continuing. _

_ “We haven’t really decided on a date, but I had these made just for us,” he said and opened the box. Nestled in the gray velvet lining were two thick black wedding bands. _

_ “They are…” Felicity said with tears filling her eyes. _

_ “They are made from the point of one of my arrows,” he said and she could see the happiness flash through his eyes. _

_ Even though his alter ego was something he had to keep a secret, Felicity saw how much including it in the most important moment in their lives meant to him. _

_ “There is more,” Oliver said sliding the band on and handing her the other one. “Tap it.” _

_ Felicity held the band and tapped it. Suddenly the ring pulsed with a heartbeat strong and clear. _

_ “Oh my God, Oliver,” Felicity cried. “That’s your heart.” _

_ The smile that spread across his face made her heart melt. The tears flowed freely down her cheeks and she pulled him close, their lips pressing together. _

_ “How did you do this?” she asked. _

_ “Tommy’s idea,” Oliver said. “He read about it and arranged the whole thing.” _

_ Felicity sniffled and laid the ring back in the box, feeling uneasy about wearing it before they were truly married. She wiped the tears from her cheeks. _

_ “Tommy wanted you to know I was alright no matter how far apart we were,” Oliver said. _

_ “You can’t wear a wedding ring out in the field,” she said warningly. _

_ “I can and I will,” Oliver replied with finality. _

_ “No you don’t understand,” Felicity said pulling away from him. “People will be able to identify it and you. The apparent tech used for this would be easily traceable for even an amateur hacker.” _

_ “Felicity…” Oliver started, his hand reaching to grasp hers, but she pulled away from him. _

_ “Promise me,” she said more sternly. _

_ “I want to never take this off because I want everyone to know my heart is yours,” Oliver said. _

_ “Yes, your heart, Oliver Queen, but not the Green Arrow’s heart,” she said trying to make her point. _

_ “I wear gloves,” he said _

_ “What if you are captured?” Felicity said her voice trembling. The thought of it made her insides tie in knots. She had dealt with his capture before, but this felt different and much more desperate. Oliver would be her husband and there was so much more to lose. _

_ “No matter what you say,” Oliver said slowly, “The Green Arrow’s heart is yours too and I want to wear my ring.” _

_ Felicity hated to argue with him about wanting to prove his love, but this was life or death in his line of work. _

_ “I’ll make you a deal,” she started, “I will get your a silicone ring to wear in the field. Less dangerous with your bow and with the tracking.” _

_ Oliver sighed and pulled her into his arms. Felicity softened at his touch and let him kiss her on top of her head. _

_ “If it makes you feel better,” he finally conceded. _

_ She kissed him, letting his lips soothe her fears and wash them away. Felicity knew their married life was far from normal and that was something they would always have to fight against. For now though, Felicity could agree and that eased her fears if only slightly. _

  
  


“Hey,” Tommy Merlyn said as he came into the room, his shoulders slumped as though the weight of the world was on them. The grim look on his face made Felicity’s stomach knot, but now was not the time to revisit those memories.

“I have his ring,” he said holding out Oliver’s wedding ring in his palm Felicity looked at it and smiled. All those memories tied to just one object that Oliver wore most of the time.

“Thanks for finding it Tommy,” she said.

“I was glad to help,” Tommy said and closed his hand around the ring and pocketed the token. She was thankful he was there with her.

“You almost ready?” he asked. Felicity nodded, words escaping her as she looked over the shirt, tie and suit she laid out on the bed for Oliver.

She had made Oliver wait long enough.


	4. Chapter 4

“I’ll take those for you, Dig said as Felicity carried out a garment bag, with Oliver’s clothes inside, to the main living room.

“Thank you,” Felicity said handing him the bag and sliding her feet into her heels. She checked herself in the hall mirror again to make sure she looked presentable.

She was thrown into that moment right before she walked down the aisle to commit to Oliver forever. It seemed so long ago, when it really was merely a year ago.

 

_ “I think he will drop dead,” Thea said as Felicity checked herself in the mirror for the hundredth time. It had to be perfect because this was her perfect moment with the man she loved more than anything. _

_ “Don’t say that,” Felicity laughed. Thea was the sister she never had and was glad she was getting through her marriage to Oliver. _

_ “My brother was stupid to not to hit earlier,” Thea laughed and Felicity blushed a bright red against her white dress. Although she agreed, there was no reason to encourage Thea at the moment. _

_ Felicity spent two months hunting for the perfect gown to surprise Oliver on their wedding day. The search had been extensive, with Thea calling in a few favors, but with all the help, Felicity settled on the long white gown she was sure he wouldn’t expect from her. The shirt skimmed the floor, made of layers and layers of white tulle. The tulle was covered with silver holographic dots that made it shine like stars in the night sky. The top was the same material, fitting snugly to her curves with small spaghetti straps over her shoulders. _

_ Felicity chose to wear her hair loosely around her shoulders. Thea spent the whole morning sliding small pins throughout it that were accented with clear stones. When the light caught her hair just right, it looked as though it sparkled with all the power of the night sky. _

_ “My baby!” Felicity heard from the other room as her mother announced herself with high pitched squeals of excitement. Felicity was starting to get used to the way her mom carried on, but sometimes it was still surprising. _

_ “Mom,” Felicity greeted her mother with a hug, trying not to wrinkle her dress before the big reveal. _

_ “Beautiful,” Donna said as she held Felicity at arm length to study the entire picture. There were small tears forming in the corner of Donna’s eyes, but Felicity tried to avoid looking directly at them or it would be water works for both of them. _

_ “Thanks,” Felicity said and tried to keep her tears at bay, but she thought it was a battle she might not be able to win in the end as the lump started to rise in her throat. _

_ “Hi Donna,” Thea said and smiled, giving the older woman a small wave. _

_ “My little Queen,” Donna said and released Felicity long enough to pull Thea into a tight hug. _

_ Felicity’s mother always surprised her with the way she cared for those around her and when it came to Oliver and Thea the surprise doubled. They were two orphans that Donna had no trouble accepting as her own without question. Although Moira Queen’s shoes were large ones to fill, Donna stepped in and helped where and when she was needed, even if it was a late night call from Thea about a problem she was having. That was the amazing thing about her mom and Felicity’s swelled with pride as she watched the two of them together, like friends who had been apart for some time, but were getting caught up once again. _

_ “Oliver is a lucky man,” Donna said, a watery smile crossing her lips. _

_ “No crying,” Thea said breaking the stare between them. “This is happy. Remember?” _

_ Felicity nodded and sniffled. This was happy and good. Her dream was happening and she just needed to relax and enjoy it. She couldn’t let anyone steal her joy today. This was too many years in the making for that to happen. _

_ “Any words of wisdom?” Felicity asked her mother. Although her mother wasn’t always the best with choosing men, Felicity knew her mother was smart when it came to life. _

_ “Let him love you,” Donna said softly. “No matter how it seems wrong, just let him lavish you with love that he’s been holding inside for too long. I think it will be good for both of you.” _

_ It seemed so easy, but could it really be that way for them? They had secrets and it would be a hard life for them. Felicity knew how the mission as the Green Arrow consumed Oliver, but she loved all of him, even the dark parts he tried to hide. Those were the things that made him who he was and Felicity accepted it all. _

_ “It’s time!” Thea announced and Felicity felt her heart in her throat. Those doors would open and her forever was on the other side. Felicity held her mother’s hand for dear life as Thea handed her the bouquet. The world seemed unreal as she walked slowly with her mother, Thea steps ahead of them in her pale green gown. _

_ God how Felicity had grown to love green, especially the leather kind that wrapped itself around Oliver like a glove. _

_ As the doors to the garden opened, Felicity saw Oliver, their eyes locking. Anyone who didn’t know him as well as she did would assume he was calm and collected like he always seemed to be, but the shift in his jaw told her another story. There was a nervous man waiting for her, but he was also intrigued by the dress. _

_ She smiled at him, letting the scene find a special place in her memory. Felicity could feel her mother’s hand as it gripped hers. She wasn’t sure who was more excited at that moment. _

_ This was what she fought so hard for all those time he pushed away. She fought for them and in the end it would be them. _


	5. Chapter 5

“I’m going ahead,” Dig said and grabbed the garment bag where Oliver’s clothes were placed neatly inside. Felicity nodded in response. It was about all she could manage at the moment. The lump in her throat continued to grow, making speech difficult for her.

“Tommy will take you when you are ready,” Dig finished and clamped her on the shoulder. Felicity didn’t know if she would ever be ready, but nodded anyway so that Dig wouldn’t be worried about her. He had enough on his mind.

The door opened and closed as Dig left, but Felicity noticed that Laurel had slipped into the room, her eyes red from what Felicity assumed was crying. Laurel had always been a sore spot for her, but Felicity always tried to not let it bother her. There were days she managed better than others and sometimes she couldn’t help the jealousy that came to the surface.

 

_ “What?” Oliver asked as the silence thickened between them in the car. Felicity nervously twisted her hands in her laps as they continued towards home. She saw the white knuckle grip Oliver had on the steering wheel. Clearly he was upset with her, but she had feelings too. Oliver always said he wanted her to be honest, but now she felt as though she was being petty. She felt as though she was bothering him with the jealousy welling inside of her. _

_ “It’s nothing,” Felicity said quietly, her finger, messing with her engagement ring. It sparkled from the cool blue glow of the dashboard lights. _

_ “You’re lying,” Oliver said rather harshly and Felicity jumped at his tone. She wasn’t afraid, but the tone caught her off guard. He usually reserved that tone for someone who was looking at him from the end of the arrow. There were few times she was on the receiving end and usually gave it back just as much, but tonight was a different story. _

_ “I’m sorry,” he sighed rubbing a hand over his face, his eyes never leaving the road and Felicity felt so alone in that moment and she knew Oliver wasn’t making her feel that way on purpose. _

_ “Pull over,” Felicity said. _

_ “What?” Oliver asked his voice full of disbelief. _

_ “Pull over!” Felicity said more forcefully. Oliver sighed and slowed the car, pulling to the shoulder of the road. It was past midnight and few cars were traveling the road. _

_ Felicity opened her door and stepped to the side of the road, taking in the fresh air. The car was too oppressive and Oliver was aggravated. She hated when he was agitated because he always reverted to Arrow mode and sometimes was unreasonable. It was endearing at moments, but right now it was rubbing her the wrong way. _

_ “Talk to me Felicity,” he said quietly, his tone softer this time. She could tell that he was trying. _

_ “I needed some air,” she said as calmly as she could manage. In the moment, she wanted to run, but knew they had to work through this or their engagement meant nothing. _

_ “Just tell me what is going on,” Oliver asked approaching her calmly. Felicity took a step back and Oliver’s face fell. _

_ “It was her,” Felicity said quietly looking at her feet. She couldn’t bring herself to look into his eyes. In those eyes, she would be lost and unable to truly convey her feelings. This needed to be said. _

_ “Who?” _

_ Felicity licked her dry lips, letting her engagement ring twirl on her finger as she fidgeted with it. Somehow she hoped it would bring her comfort, but it was just a symbol of how Oliver felt and couldn’t do what his arms always managed to do for her. _

_ “Laurel,” Felicity let the name slide from her mouth and it felt wrong. She felt as though she shouldn’t even be saying it. _

_ “Laurel?” Oliver asked, his voice exasperated. _

_ “I went to the bathroom and when I came back, there you were with her,” Felicity said tears beginning to fill her eyes. _

_ “And looking at you with her, I could see all those years between you,” she finished. “There is so much there Oliver. So much that you shared with her.” _

_ She felt Oliver moving closer and held up a hand to stop him. If she stopped now, she would never get all of her feelings out and it was important to let the man she loved know just how she felt. _

_ “When you were gone, Laurel mourned for you because she lost the man she loved,” Felicity said raising her eyes to look at Oliver. Standing there was not the confident man who defended Star City with a bow and arrows, but a man who was conflicted. _

_ “That is something that will always be between you,” Felicity whispered. “How do I compete with a lifetime of memories?” _

_ Oliver approached her and pulled her against his chest. Feeling his arms holding her tightly, Felicity relaxed into him, letting him wash away all the jealousy and doubt. _

_ “The man Laurel knew died on the Gambit and was buried on the island,” he whispered. “Laurel thinks she knows me, but she knows the Oliver I want her to know. _

_ “You know all of me, even the terrible and scary parts, yet you still love me.” _

_ Holding her at arm’s length, he looked her in the eyes as though he was seeing them for the first time. _

_ “She could never compete with you. You are made for me, flaws and all,” he whispered. “Thank you fr finding the real me, Felicity.” _

_ Her lips found his and she kissed him filling the kiss with all the things she wanted to say, but couldn't find the right words to express. _

_ “Don’t ever be jealous of Laurel again,” he said. “You are always my one and only choice. I survived an island and torture to find you. She has nothing on you.” _


	6. Chapter 6

There was never a time Felicity doubted that Oliver would return to her side. Not once did she believe that the enemies he faced would take him away permanently. Maybe that was where the true shock came from to her. Just five days earlier he had been talking to her and then there was nothing. Now she felt nothing but numb.

  
  


_ “I can do this,” Oliver growled through the comm at both Felicity and John. She hated that growl, but he was being as stubborn as he always was lately. _

_ Felicity usually bumped heads when he was acting this way, but today she didn’t have the energy. It had been a long night and Oliver was just cleaning up. She didn’t like it and fidgeted with her wedding ring as she listened to the sound _ of his breathing as he ran.

_ “Spartan,” Oliver called obviously pointing something out to John. The sounds of shots, not unusual, sounded through the open comm. _

_ “Behind you!” John’s voice was clear and then there was a pause. Her heart was thumping in her ears, waiting for his reply. _

_ “Got ‘em,” Oliver’s voice said and Felicity let out a breath she didn’t know she had been holding. _

_ “Two more,” Felicity chimed in as she read the heat signatures of the remaining men. _

_ The sound of a door creaking came across the comm. There was an eerie silence, then several grunts. The sounds were not unusual and she stood watching as the screen bloomed with at least fifteen heat signatures that appeared out of nowhere. _

_ “There are too many,” Felicity called through the open comm. “Green Arrow, Spartan, abort!” _

_ The grunting continued as Felicity watched the signatures converge on John and Oliver. Her heart sank to her feet as she could only listen to the fight. Things had been worse, Felicity kept telling herself as she listened, her hands unable to stay still as she twirled her hair around her fingers. _

_ “Overwatch,” John’s breathless voice came across the comms. _

_ “I’m bringing him back,” John’s voice said and Felicity heard the strain in his voice. He was obviously not able to walk on his own and that was a bad sign. _

_ “How long?” Felicity asked finally finding her voice. _

_ “Three minutes.” _

_ Felicity busied herself preparing the medical equipment. The comm had gone silent because she was sure John had cut her off. If Oliver was awake, she was sure he would demand she didn’t hear him in pain. _

_ The elevator door opened and John carried Oliver to the table. They were soaked in blood, so much blood. Oliver was pale and limp as John put him down. She couldn’t move, her hand covering her mouth in shock. _

_ “Felicity!” John shouted and her eyes darted to John. _

_ “Help me change him because he has to go to the hospital,” John said putting his hands on her shoulders. “We don’t have much time.” _

_ Felicity felt her feet moving, but her mind was numb. She helped John change Oliver, but there was so much blood. There was a coating on her hands and her blouse was soaked. God how could there be so much blood? _

_ “Felicity call 911,” John said picking up Oliver’s limp body from the table. _

_ “Where do I tell them?” she asked as the repercussions of what they had spent their time doing in the evening coming down on her. _

_ “Give them the address, his secret hideout is the last thing I’m worried about,” John growled from the elevator. _

_ She dialed 911 and didn’t know how she even relayed the information to the dispatcher as she rode the elevator to the top. _

_ Searching, she found John outside the building holding Oliver in his arms. There were tears streaming down Dig’s face as he waited. Felicity laid a hand on John’s shoulder and felt the tears pooling in her eyes. Her other hand ran through Oliver’s sweat soaked hair. _

_ “What happened John?” she asked through the tears. _

_ “He was surrounded. There were so many people and I couldn’t stop them,” John’s shaky voice answered. “I was supposed to protect him for you, but I couldn’t.” _

_ She could never remember a time when John had been so distressed by Oliver’s injuries. It made bile rise in her throat and then she was stepping away from them and throwing up in the opening of an alley nearby. _

_ The sirens rang to her bones as the red lights cut through the darkness of the night. Her heart was getting into that ambulance and Felicity wasn’t sure she would ever be the same. Oliver, the man who was her destiny, never woke to her sobbing. He was there, but she could feel him slipping away, no matter how tightly she hung on. _

 

Felicity felt Tommy’s hand in hers as they entered the building. She stopped inside the door and felt as though she couldn’t move another step. If Felicity accepted this to be truth, and not a dream, then it was final. She wasn’t prepared for the finality of the moment and released Tommy’s hand, turning to walk back out the door.

“Felicity…” Tommy started and stopped her from opening the door with his hand.

“I can’t,” she whispered, dropping her head. The pain of the moment washed over her body from top to bottom. Her legs began trembling and threatened to give way, throwing her to the floor. There wasn’t enough air in her lungs as she gasped trying to fill them. The grip she had on Tommy’s arm tightened and she felt his hand trying to steady her. The sounds of the room were blocked out by the buzzing filling her ears.

God he was gone. He would never kiss her forehead again, never hug her tight, never make love to her in the early morning hours. They would never have children to call their own. Her tomorrows had been stolen and deleted. No matter how she tried, there was no ever after for them.

“Felicity…” she heard someone calling her name. Turning, she saw Tommy’s worried expression as he pulled her tight against his chest.In that moment, Felicity wanted to push him away because he wasn’t Oliver. All those promises meant nothing if he wasn’t there to keep them.

 

_ “I’ll be safe..I’ll come back...Stop worrying because I’ve been through worse...I have to do this.” _

  
  


Felicity wanted to scream, but the lump in her throat wouldn’t budge. 

“We have to do this,” Tommy whispered to her.

“I can’t,” she said quietly. Tommy pressed her close to his chest as though he could wish her inside the room.

“Oliver would want you to say goodbye,” Tommy whispered, his voice shaking. Felicity sobbed against his chest, her hands fisted in his shirt.How could she say goodbye to the man who was the reason she lived? Her life would be over when she said goodbye and she would never live the life that Oliver promised her. That wasn’t where this story was supposed to end for them.

Tommy pulled away from her, offering her a handkerchief. Felicity accepted and dabbed at her eyes.

“Take my hand,” he instructed and her numb fingers intertwined with his. She felt cold and shivered as they slowly walked towards the second set of doors. The air around her grew thicker and Felicity gasped as she tried to get her breath.

“Almost there,” Tommy said clutching her arm as though she might run at any moment.

She couldn't make it, the pain in her chest threatening to strangle her. How could Tommy seem so composed? Felicity stopped and turned to look at Tommy as though she was seeing him for the first time.

“You’ve done this before,” she said numbly.

“Felicity, this isn’t the first time I’ve mourned Oliver,” he said quietly.

“God, Tommy,” Felicity said, tears rising in her eyes. “He’s never coming back. Oliver is gone and he won’t come back this time.”

Her legs threatened to give out and she clung to Tommy’s arm. This wasn’t happening because Felicity wouldn’t let it happen. She could control his destiny.

“Just through here,” Tommy said as they continued to walk. As the doors parted to allow them entrance, Felicity almost lost her balance. The scent of too many flowers filled her nostrils, but the sight of Dig standing next to the casket where her Oliver lay, as though the bodyguard was still on duty, caused her to sob uncontrollably.

Her Oliver was there and yet he was gone. He had left her and she couldn’t bring him back, no one could.

 

_ “You know you’ve always been the better part of me, right?” Oliver said as they lay in bed on a lazy Sunday morning. _

_ “Same,” Felicity laughed and planted a kiss on his lips. She loved him and it was all she would ever need in life. _

  
  
  



End file.
